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Third-Hand Smoke: Just as Dangerous

Keith Josef Adkins — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 14:09:00 GMT

I know it's impossible to live a germ-free, toxin-free, bubble life, but if new research on third-hand smoking is accurate, I may need to move to some remote mountain town in upper Manitoba to make that bubble life really happen. In the January edition of Pediatrics, researchers have published findings that suggest not only is direct smoking and indirect inhalation[second-hand] deadly, third-hand smoke is hazardous as well. Third-hand smoke is the toxins from cigarettes that collect on your clothing, hair and furniture and endangers family, friends and babies. I may have to literally move into a cave.

I'm obviously not an advocate of smoking. A few years ago, an iridologist read my irises [yes, I believe the eyes are also the window to our physical well-being] and informed me that my lungs had been slightly tarnished by second-hand smoke. I was shocked at first, but then I remembered my parents smoked in the 70s and quit, according to them, because I begged like a broke-down bum. A few weeks ago, a cousin passed away from emphysema and blood clots on the lungs from a lifetime of heavy smoking. He was 60. And I don't know about your town, but smoking has become the "it" thing to do in New York City. If you're not rolling through the streets with straight-legged jeans and a cigarette, well, you're basically a relic... and risking your life, too, with constant exposure to second- and now third-hand smoke.

What's the solution here?

AIRTRAN and THEIR MUSLIM PHOBIAS

Keith Josef Adkins — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 13:48:10 GMT

Look, I'm no stranger to airport/airline harassment. And I'm sure I'm one of thousands who had their three dollar toothpaste confiscated at the security gate and was left speechless and angered. But however tempting, I wasn't going to blog about the incident on AirTran with the 9 Muslims because it felt... regressive. I was beyond that now. Right? But then I gave it a second thought and decided it's better to purge the remnance of airline outrage and live anger-free. During post-911 I was pulled over by airport security at least ten times. They looked inside of my shoes, they perused by "toiletries" bag, they even police-padded my crotch, and at one point someone questioned my "true" national origin. I was wearing a Maori fish hook around my neck and I guess they thought it was a hidden symbol for international terrorism. Which brings me to this: Bernard Madoff got away with 50 billion dollars in investment frauds, some cat dressed up like Santa was sniping innocents on a California highway and the pharmaceutical industry is making a mint off a nation raised on a destructive diet, but a 9-member family of traditionally-dressed Muslims innocently mentioned something about the safety of a plane and they're called terrorists? Oh, I know! Muslims, "colored people", and the occasional ***-feeding mother ['cause you never know what type of danger lurks inside that mammory gland] should keep their mouths closed and sit like corpses until the flight comes to a complete stop to assure America there's nothing to worry about. Whew! I said it. Now I can get on with my day. Oh, one more thing: Apology or not, I hope that Muslim family sues the wheels off of AirTran.

Gov. Richardson out as Commerce Secretary

izraelj — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 19:08:41 GMT

Citing a federal probe into a company that did business with his state, New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson dips out as president-elect Barack Obama's commerce secretary...aye carumba. "Let me say unequivocally that I and my Administration have acted properly in all matters and that this investigation will bear out that fact," he said Sunday. "But I have concluded that the ongoing investigation also would have forced an untenable delay in the confirmation process."

Wow.

Well, alot of folks in the Latino community weren't happy that Richardson had taken such a token position in the first place. Now, maybe they wish they had it back. Not to down-play his considerable accomplishments to this point, but I wonder how Richardson will recover from this... I mean, he had a chance to be a part of history. And now, he'll be a footnote. Not a good look.

How will this impact the Latino community, and who will be the next logical choice to fill that seat?

Color by Numbers

izraelj — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 18:24:59 GMT

I've learned that over the years, you can find statistics to prove just about any point you want to make...especially about black folks. In a report due to be released today the NYT says we find out that killings among black teenagers is up 39 percent since 2001. Well, I didn't buy it, and neither did Ta-nehesi Coates. Steven Levitt did his due diligence on the matter.The numbers are up, but the percentage isn't noteworthy, in my opinion.

I don't want to pretend that we don't have a problem in the streets of America with crime, because we do. But it seems too easy to demonize young black folks and fabricate charts that don't tell the whole story.

Neatness Counts

izraelj — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 22:39:32 GMT

I can't decide if this story is about 'keeping it real gone wrong' or tough love. Either way, let it be a lesson to you that if you get too trifling, your people may come and haul you away.

Happy 2009!!!

Keith Josef Adkins — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 14:33:45 GMT

I wanted to take a moment and wish everyone an amazing, productive, focused, loving, honest, challenging, thoughtful, relentlessly-positive, budget-conscious, fly, delicious, inclusive, forgiving, say-what-you-feel, do-how-you-do New Year!

Any resolutions?

Rick Warren: In Jesus' name, Amen

Keith Josef Adkins — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 13:55:46 GMT

If you talk to most Christians [and most of them, in my experience, lean toward conservative], ending a prayer, sermon, benediction, or a holiday blessing in Jesus' name is paramount and without question, mandatory. It is, more or less, the Christian trademark. And if you decide to lead a prayer among Christians and don't bookend it with Jesus, then trust, your faith and your afterlife will be questioned from the storefronts of Muncie to the kitchens of Lubbock, Texas. Well, the Reverend Rick Warren has refused to make a satisfactory comment when asked if he would end the inauguration prayer in Jesus' name [particularly in a country populated by citizens of varying faiths and some who even live without religion of any kind]. Warren's only remark is he'll pray the way Christians pray [and that, in my experience, means he'll do it Jesus' name].

It goes without saying I'm suspect of Obama's choice of Rick Warren. Anyone who advocates to deny a person's human rights is an enemy of mine. But I think it's much larger than that: Warren represents everything wrong in this country—non-tolerance, self-righteousness with a smile and a HIV ministry, the flawed and often unevolved deciding what's best for all, cocky ignorance, and an inability to see oneself as an experience among many other experiences. A friend of mine believes Obama chose him to create debate and ultimately change when it comes to this country's history of pompous intolerance. I think that's wishful thinking. Now don't get me wrong. This is not an attack against Christians. But I just think if you're going to have an inauguration prayer, chose a minister who will honor us all—Muslim, agnostic, Christian, Hebrew, Hindu, secular non-believer... you know, the many faces who elected Obama as president.

Fetishing The Obamas

izraelj — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 18:14:47 GMT

I’ve been waiting to read the piece about contrasting reactions to the fetishing of the Obama’s : the universal outcry about peeping the First Booty to the universal swooning about Shirtless Obama.

I’ve not seen it, so I guess that means I should write it.

I didn’t see the big deal with Erin Aubry Kaplan’s piece about Michelle Obama’s butt. However, the beauty-shop said that there was some idea that this observation diminished Obama’s impact as an educated, successful black woman. The truth? The First Booty had been a barbershop meme for a year or better and I think a lot of women felt betrayed that woman would bring man-talk into the public sphere.

So color me perplexed when I learned that a shirtless Barack Obama had been snapped by paparazzi. I was disturbed by the rush of Mandingo lust from a mainstream media who have subtly—and not so subtly-- sexualized him from the beginning. The beauty-shop discussion dissecting his pectorals entered the zeitgeist with no conversation about the proper venue for these photos, “stalker-razzi” culture and the safety of the president and his family or the reduction of the Harvard grad to pin-up boy. Not a peep.

It stinks like a double-standard.

Is it ok to acknowledge Barack's sexy, but Michelle's is off-limits?

Jazz Trumpeter Freddie Hubbard: A Legend

Keith Josef Adkins — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 14:44:43 GMT

Grammy-award winner Freddie Hubbard passed away after suffering a heart attack. He was 70. In most jazz circles, Hubbard was considered one of the best trumpeters on the planet. In fact, many considered Hubbard the equal contender to Miles Davis. Now I must admit: I was one of those young Midwest cats who lived among jazz lovers and musicians [my Uncle Lesley was a trumpeter in the Ray Charles Band, my Aunt Carrie played piano and sang at the local Cotton Club, and my Cousin Zip moved to NYC and held his on as a jazz vocalist], but I had no measurable clue about jazz's impact or import. And trust me, every chance my fam had they'd let me know just that. They'd actually send my pubescent ignorance outdoors while they turned up the brave complexity of Hubbard, Coleman and Coltrane and tuned out the deafening sound of an often hostile and racist world. It wasn't until I reached adulthood did I learn to appreciate the music and the men and women who made the music happen. I certainly didn't morph into a jazz enthusiast or scholar, but I was able to understand [soul-deep] the evolution of west African song to Field Holler to Spiritual to Freddie Hubbard picking up his trumpet and blowing some Red Clay and bringing texture and unbelievable expression to the black American experience vis a vis his lips, his breath, my ears. Freddie Hubbard is legend.

It's been fabulous. See you in a couple of weeks.

rebeccawalker — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 06:13:45 GMT

Lest you think I've been off the grid somewhere north of Machu Piccu, I'm here to set the record straight. I've been procrastinating, circling my laptop because even though I've written it a thousand times in my head, this is not an easy post to write. It's tough because it's the entry where I tell all of you it's my last post, and that the journey of writing this blog has been like, well, planting a seed and watching it take root.

Just as I sighed in both joy and sadness a few days ago watching Tenzin blow out four birthday candles (he's almost in college!), I've been doing the same when thinking about this post. Yes, I'm moving from Seeds to Views, which will give me an opportunity to write longer pieces on The Root, and I know it's going to be wonderful (and give me a lot more time to write books, lecture, paddleboard, and be a rocking mom).

But I'm sad, too, because it's been fun and hard and surprising, and I've learned so much from all of you who have commented and all of you who have told me at the grocery store or on the plane that even though you never comment, you love the blog. Though we haven't met, I feel I know many of you--and through you, your endlessly fascinating and profoundly loved kids.

It's been an honor to share mental space, and have you give me the "Amen", the LOL, the "You Go Girl!", the "OMG," the "No you didn't," the Thank you so much!, and the "Hmmm, I don't think so."

But I'm most proud of our work to support Michelle and Barack Obama's campaign to become the 44th First Family of the United States. We did that well here in our corner of the blogosphere, didn't we? I know we made a difference. Yes. We. Did.

So my friends, I'm awful at goodbyes. I'm the friend who slips away and sends an email the next day. If cornered, I do a quick hug and kiss and then keep moving, completely certain we'll meet again soon.

In this case, I really am certain. An excerpt of my new book, One Big Happy Family, will be up on the site in a couple of weeks, and my fourth Views piece will follow shortly thereafter. If my superb editor Lynette Clemetson will let me, I will keep an archive of these posts on my home blog, where you can always, always find me.

So let's not say goodbye, okay? Thanks for everything. It's been fabulous. See you in a couple of weeks.

Black Boys Killing Black Boys

Keith Josef Adkins — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 14:10:26 GMT

James Alan Fox of Northeastern University released a devastating report today: murder among black teenage boys is on the rise. In most enlightened corners the topic of black on black violence remains front and center. From Haki Madhubuti to Sonia Sanchez to Cornell West, the call to do something about our boys killing each other has been loud, but it appears [according to Fox's report] our nation's black boys are the only ones not hearing it.

As a former black teen male I'm uber-sensitive to what's happening in the black teen male community. It turns my stomach when I hear one of them call another "***", argue with another about stepped-on Nike Air Max, or see one fight another over anything. Last summer, a group of teen males were loitering [as teenagers do] on the stoops of an abandoned brownstone. They were drinking, laughing and enjoying a hot summer night. But then things turned ugly. Someone said something disrespectful to another and within seconds one teenage boy was literally stomping another on the hard cement sidewalk. He wanted to kill him and some of the teen spectators were yelling out for him to "kill his ass". Even over the holidays, I was informed that my teenage cousin was stopped by a group of teenage boys and was harassed for carrying schoolbooks and then threatened to "beat him down" if he didn't hand over some cash.

I know many people [and statisticians] believe the absence of black fathers is the cause of unrest in the black teen male community. Others blame dismantled public education, a weakened police force; some even point the finger at the church or the mosque for not knocking some sense into these boys.

But I have a different theory: I blame horrific eating habits—faux food infused with sugars, additives, preservatives and deadly processing that morphs into uncontrollable hyperactivity. Then add to the equation teachers who treat these boys like trespassers and criminals [even in the third grade] and then add black male-hating police who patrol their neighborhoods watching their every move [even before the age of ten]. Then you add an uncaring media that only illuminates their aggressive albeit athletic skills and romanticizes a ghetto lifestyle full of guns, homicide, misogyny and bling baby bling where they're crowned ruthless monarch of the Hood. Not to mention the number of black women who accuse their adult templates of being AIDS-carrying downlow nobodies, or inept fathers, or jobless derelicts.

This all adds up to black teen males not finding any sustainable value and beauty within themselves and if they can't see it in themselves then they certainly can't see it in other black teen males. And guess what? If you don't see the beauty in yourself, if everyone and -thing around you deems you expendable and suspect, well... nothing and nobody matters. And what are WE going to do about THAT?

Eartha Kitt and Her Signature Sizzle

Keith Josef Adkins — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 18:46:00 GMT

The Legend. The Sizzle. The Woman.

Singer/Actress Eartha Kitt passed away on December 25. During the Thanksgiving holiday a friend of a friend was in New York City and mentioned Ms. Kitt was battling cancer and was no longer interested in chemo and treatment. In fact, he said it appeared she was tired and ready to transition. The friend of a friend was devasted by what he interpreted as Ms. Kitt's surrender. He confessed she's been ill for quite some time, but still managed to perform with her signature vitality. He thought she'd be around forever.

I grew up during the Legend of Eartha Kitt. Her name would pop up in adult discourse about who's who in black celebrity and even one of my older brothers had a black and white pin-up of Ms. Kitt on his bedroom wall. And although I saw her perform Cat Woman in syndication and once my mom and I watched Anna Lucasta, my Eartha Kitt expertise was second-hand. Then she popped up on Living Single and Boomerang, and later as the evil bondswoman who dirtied the life of an octoroon in Feast of All Saints, I remembered thinking: Yes, this woman sizzles and this woman can ACT and this woman satisfies the sultry myth. Oh, and how can I forget about discovering Ms. Kitt made anti-Vietnam remarks and nearly was exiled from the country—I quickly became an invested fan.

Eartha Kitt is gone, but her political and artistic sizzle will keep burning.

Time To Say Goodbye

Marc Lamont Hill — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 15:05:41 GMT

Can you believe that it’s been a year already?

For the past year, I’ve had the extraordinary pleasure of writing the “Down From The Tower” blog here on TheRoot. Without question, it has been one of the most interesting, challenging, and rewarding experiences of my professional life.

Last January, when my dear friend and colleague Melissa Harris-Lacewell and I started this blog, we aimed to offer our own perspectives on race, politics, and popular culture. While I knew that it would be fun, I had no idea how rewarding it would be to exchange ideas with such a brilliant and engaging interlocutor. Through our exchanges, particularly about Barack Obama, I learned the value of and virtue of civil, respectful, and principled disagreement. Thanks Melissa!

In addition to sharing this blog with Melissa, I also shared it with all of you who read on a regular basis. Through your responses, both through email and the often-contentious comments section, I gained access to thousands of opinions and perspectives that have challenged me and pushed my thinking in ways that I never anticipated Thank you!

Unfortunately, family, my run here has come to an end. The demands of fatherhood, scholarship, and activism have conspired to send me to an early blog retirement. Still, though this will be the final post of “Down From The Tower,”I am not going too far. In addition to working on my own projects, I will be regularly posting pieces to the “Views” section of TheRoot. Hopefully we can continue our year-long conversation and take in new and even more exciting directions.

Love y’all,

marc

An Open Christmas List to the Black Community

Keith Josef Adkins — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 20:00:32 GMT

They say this is the season for giving, well, I have a few special requests for a few holiday givers.

1. Stress not!!!

2. Support films [or in most corners, movies] on Christmas day that illuminate the complexity of all people. Here's some suggestions: Slumdog Millionaire, Mongol [you can rent it], Trouble the Water [the amazing documentary about Katrina and New Orleans].

3. Call someone who you haven't spoken to in a while due to a monetary or material dispute and tell them you're wishing them the best. [Still get your money or DVD returned, but reach out and offer a greeting].

4. In lieu of Macy gifts or the latest Apple product, purchase gift cards for grocery stores with ample veggies and processed-free food. Trader Joes are everywhere now and you can get organic for low costs.

5. Read Toni Morrison's A Mercy. It makes no sense that the entire community hasn't read the Pulitzer Prize and Nobel Prize winner. Hey, I'll make it easy: at least read the FIRST chapter.

6. Use dinner time as an opportunity to talk to each other about each other as opposed to talking about the days and nights of celebrities and Barack Obama's inauguration suit.

7. Find a video camera [or camera phone] and interview the oldest member of your family. Ten minutes will suffice.

8. If you drink, drink to be merry, not to end up on the evening news in a body bag [I'm sorry to be so morbid, but folks are hard of hearing during the holiday].

9. Smile. If you can't get your face to make a smile then smile with your feet or something. It won't kill you.

10. Stop worshiping Obama. He's not the messiah. He's a brilliant politician with Hawaiian warmth and he can make a promise like nobody's business, but he's not the Second Coming. He's the president. What I'm sayingis it's not HIS birthday and you don't have to put him on your Christmas card list.

The First Lady's Roots

izraelj — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 16:43:08 GMT

I thought this joint on Michelle Obama's roots was intrusive, yet, informative.

Grading The Cabinet

Marc Lamont Hill — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 15:58:43 GMT

With inauguration a few weeks away, Barack Obama has nearly completed his choices for key cabinet and advisory positions. Here is my report card for several key ones:

Hillary Clinton (Secretary of State)– While this pick should squelch any notion of a Clinton mutiny in 2012, it’s hard to stomach the fact that she was selected over more qualified candidates like Bill Richardson or even John Kerry. Grade: C

Robert Gates (Secretary of Defense) – This holdover from the Bush Administration makes sense to the extent that he provides stability and know-how, both of which necessary to continue prosecuting the current senseless wars. As long as Gates can change political gears from Bush’s war hawishness to Obama’s semi-hawikshness, he’ll be a solid pick for the president-elect. Grade: A-

James Jones (National Security Advisor) – General Jones brings strong experience and a healthy relationship with Hillary Clinton, a factor that cannot be underestimated. Unfortunately, his failure to speak out against Bush’s mishandling of Iraq and Afghanistan has drawn appropriately intense criticism from both sides of the aisle. Grade:

Timothy Geithner (Secretary of Treasury) – For decades, the president of the Federal Reserve of New York has developed an extensive record of resolving economic crises. In fact, there doesn’t appear to be anyone better qualified to repair our biggest disaster in nearly 100 years. Besides, the most likely alternative was the misanthropic Larry Summers. Grade: A

Arne Duncan (Secretary of Education) – Instead of selecting change-oriented experts like Linda Darling-Hammond, President-Elect Obama went with the CEO of Chicago Public Schools. While some depict Duncan as a passionate reformer, others view him as a pro-privatization union buster who has only intensified the city’s educational apartheid. At a moment where the very notion of “public” is coming under attack, Duncan represents a disturbing move toward the educational Right. Grade: D.

Rick Warren - Although he is not joining the cabinet, the evangelical leader has been selected to give the invocation at the inauguration. Perhaps this is an olive branch to whites who are still angry about Jeremiah Wright. Maybe Obama doesn’t care that Warren is disturbingly anti-gay and anti-choice. Either way, this choice might be the scariest of all. Grade F-

Overall, Obama has assembled a cabinet that is rich on experience but short on progressive (not to mention female) voices. The fact that multiple members of the Bush cabinet have applauded his choices is proof that the President-elect has done little to prepare us for the change he promised. Final Grade C-

That's Racist!

izraelj — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 14:22:08 GMT

Racism is kind of like the new pornography: no one can articulate the difference between ignorance and racism, but there's some sense that we all know it when we see it. Perhaps the least tasteful by-product of the Obama Age is the idea that everything's "racist" now. White people think you are being racist if you are too black (some have accused this site of being "racist") and black people think whites are being racist just by waking up in the morning. Everyone is hyper-vigilante, trying to catch other folks in the act and beat them newspapers, like bad puppies.

Well, not me.

I'm not convinced that ignorant people are racist, but I am convinced that "racism" has become a buzz word we use to brand ignorance and shut down what could become valuable dialog. White people have ignored black people for so long, they have no idea who we are or what to expect from us, so there are bound to be all kinds of gaffes here and there.

What do I mean?

Well, I've got a great story about such a gaffe. True Story.

People that know mein the real world know that I wear my hair in a bun from time to to time--it's the most conservative thing you can do with 2 feet of hair, right? Well, I was on my way to get a routine drug test for work and one of my white workmates opined that I could hide a small jar of clean urine (as if) in my hair, if I wanted to.... and then proceeded to grab and squeeze my bun of hair and see if there was, in fact, a small jar of clean urine in it. Stone sober. Dead serious.

OK.

Now, the other thing people who know me in the real world will tell you is that touching my hair is off-limits. Unless we are intimates, as in, horizontally, there's no good reason to be touching my hair. So I stood there, in shock, not knowing what to say to this guy who considered himself enlightened and quite a liberal. I had to decide quick if his actions were racist or ignorant--if he was acting out of some sense of privilege or just didn't know any better. The answer would determine whether I just filed it away or if he was going to need a medic. I know this is an extreme example, but what do YOU think? Was he being ignorant or racist? (Depending on the number of responses, I'll tell you how it ended up later, in the comment section.)

What's the difference between someone who is "racist" and someone who is just ignorant? At what point does ignorance become racism?

Obama's Big Gay No-No

Keith Josef Adkins — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 12:38:19 GMT

Yesterday morning a Facebook friend updated her status with: Obama chooses anti-gay evangelist to bless his presidency; I'm boycotting the inauguration. My impulse was to ignore the status update and go on with my busy day: I had a mountain of things to accomplish as well as absorbing the death of a relative and trying to meet a writing deadline. But then it hit me, why is Obama's minister choice such a surprise? Obama has been wishy-washy about his gay sentiments throughout his campaign. One day he speaks out against civil right violations, but insists marriage is between a man and a woman—no ifs ands or buts. But then during his Acceptance Speech he roars out over a crowd of millions something about opening American doors to its gay and *** citizens. And now the President-Elect has selected Saddleback Church Rick Warren to deliver his inauguration blessing, a man who was pro-Prop 8 and compared same-sex marriage to pedophilia[sex with children], incest[sex with your mother] and polygamy[sex with wife #2 if wife #1 is busy]. Wow, that's deep and complicated and Warren's obviously in need of therapy! Look, everyone has their opinions and their right to express them, but I just wish Obama would get clear on his sentiment toward gay and *** America. And if it's just a matter of assuring conservatives he's conservative, well, choose one to bless this historic event who doesn't equate legalizing same-sex partnership with having sex with five year olds.

30 Is The New 30

Marc Lamont Hill — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 18:10:14 GMT

Yesterday, I hit the big one. That’s right, I turned 30 years old. Contrary to popular belief (mostly by people in the over-30 club) 30 is not the 20. 30 is, in fact, 30. Rather than running away from my chronological destiny, however, I have decided to embrace my inner “grown man” with gratitude and optimism. To do that I’ve had to accept certain realities and respond accordingly. And so should you.

Clubwatch – Chris Rock once joked about not wanting to be the “old guy in the club.” While 30 isn’t too old yet, you must now constantly reassess whether that nightclub, party, or other social setting is appropriate. Otherwise, you’ll receive a rude awaking when that sexy young person you approach refers to you as “sir” or “ma’am.”

Change Clothes - While it’s too early to retreat to “old man” style, you can no longer keep up with the 106th and Park crowd when it comes to your sartorial choices. But don’t worry, somewhere in between silk paisley shirts and throwback jerseys is a style that is grown, sexy, and, most important, age appropriate.

Hit the Gym – Consistent exercise will keep you looking good and feeling better. ‘nuff said.

Eat to Live - While I used to be able to eat a bucket of chicken at 3AM and keep it moving, my body and my schedule have conspired against me in serious fashion. Now, fruits, vegetables, and a reasonable eating schedule are the only things that keep me awake and energetic.

Face Reality –An 18-year-old kid who is jobless and living in his mother’s basement is “finding himself.” A 35-year-old man who’s doing the same is a loser. While dreaming is great--I’ve even had a few in my younger days—we must also be realistic at some point: How likely is it that you’ll become the first middle-aged rapper? How is your plan to strike it rich in real estate going to pan out if you have no firm game plan? By marrying your dreams to mature self-assessment, you can push yourself even further.

Invest Your Money – Yes, times are hard. Still, being 30 without a bank account is not cute. If possible, try to pay off your credit cards, start a 401k, and choose some safe investments. If money’s a little tighter, try to save as much disposable income as possible. Ideally, you should be able to live 3 months from your savings if you were to lose your job,

Read a Book! - Although ignorance is never cool 30-something is the perfect age to develop deeper knowledge about history and current affairs. Whether it’s religion, politics, geography, or the economy, now is the time to begin holding it down on the knowledge front.

Give Thanks – Whether you’re 30, 50, or 100, life is a precious thing. Be thankful, as another day is never promised!

The Interracial Dating Pool

izraelj — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 16:30:10 GMT

Single life is overrated.

Like this dude, I’m back in the swim after years of marriage, and let me just say: there’s an awful lot of pee in the dating pool. My attention is focused on trying to be the best dad I can, and when that piece of my life levels out to a New Normal, then I guess I’ll be back on the block again. Like I say on my Facebook joint, I’m not taking applications right now, but trust that I do ok with the ladies. Unlike Dude, I’m not worried about the political implications of dating a white woman, because there aren’t as many eligible black women out there as Essence magazine would have you believe.

I’ve gone through period of my life where I was sincerely concerned about what coupling with a Debbie would say about my blackness. And that’s the great thing about maturity: you learn what’s really important, and what’s really important to me is being happy. If a woman from another background makes me happy, I don’t care what Al Sharpton thinks. I’m not dating by committee. If who you are involved with tarnishes your blackness, then you were probably weren’t that black to begin with.

Now, I have children and people always talk about the message you send kids when you choose a mate of another race. In my experience, children take their cues from parent: if you are uncomfortable with your choice, chances are good they will be too. And if the person you are dating is an idiot, then their color hardly matters. My last relationship was with a white woman, and it was one of the most fulfilling, truly passionate partnerships of my life. Color was not an issue with us, but we were careful not to operate as if it wasn’t an issue in the world. I think that’s key—if you are black man with a white woman, you can’t pretend like color doesn’t matter, because you have to live in a world where it does.

The thing is, I have a pretty hefty stack of applications on my desk that need to be vetted, from women of many colors, and I’m not inclined to discriminate by race. I laugh at black women who suggest that they can’t find a man because all the “good” black men are with white women. What I want to know is, where are all the good black women? Who are they all with--Nipsey Russell? You need more than race in common to be a good match...right?

The SAG Strike: An Inside Scoop

Keith Josef Adkins — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 13:06:48 GMT

Most of the actors I know are knocking heads about the possibility of a Screen Actors Guild strike. And most of them, the celebrity version too, feel a strike is a bad idea during this Economic Uncertainty. Look, SAG has its right to demand a better agreement from the AMPTP regarding internet usage and DVD residuals like the rest of us [folks got to eat], but Chrysler just shut down operations and Bristol Myers laid of hundreds. In fact, the NYC MTA just announced mammoth fare increase and the elimination/discontinuation of dozens of much-needed bus and subway lines. That means, corporations are not in the mood to give up any extra green, i.e. now "ain't a good time" for actors to go striking.

Yesterday a friend of mine called from the set of some TV pilot where he was doing stand-in work for the actor RonReaco Lee. It's a TV pilot that's not under a SAG contract, but an AFTRA [American Federation of Radio and Television Artists] one. In fact, my buddy confessed that for the last few months most of his TV work has been under AFTRA. In fact, yesterday several studios announced they have been working under AFTRA contracts for quite some time and next year's TV season may be entirely under AFTRA. In May 2008 AFTRA, whose members include radio announcers, broadcast journalists, actors, accepted a deal with the AMPTP that left SAG out in the cold. Just so you know, AFTRA paychecks aren't as lofty as the SAG ones. So not only is Economic Uncertainly written all over the wall, but a SAG strike may be in vain. Why? If the studios have AFTRA contracts to offer TV actors why worry about providing extra residuals to SAG. Be warned—a strike could push SAG into the position of "an empire of the past".

A "Mr. T" Christmas

izraelj — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 22:23:58 GMT

Mr T has endured as a caricature of black hyper-masculinity: this is the only reason he still gets work, sometimes. No thespian, there was probably never a chance his career would go anywhere. Like Gary Coleman, he was strapped to a gimmick, like so many television actors are. I thought he probably caked up with all the cartoons, dolls, cereal and such. But I guess not. He has a new comic book out, and it may very well be my stocking stuffer of choice this year. I feel like he could use my support. Because this is the kind of project you take on only when the checks stop coming in.

The Rise and Fall of Two-Parent Black Households

Keith Josef Adkins — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 13:19:18 GMT

According to a NYTimes piece by Sam Roberts, two-parent households in the black community are on the rise. [Thanks to the middle-class and an influx of "black" immigrants from the Caribbean, Mali, Sudan, etc.] The increase is also due to an official re-imagining of what defines two parents—meaning two-parent household now translates, according to the census, into any woman and man living together under the same roof, married or not, kissing or not. I'm not certain if the statistic talliers mean grandmother and father, mother and her cousin from Guyana, or boyfriend and temporary girlfriend, but in any case black children are living the good life. There's a five percent increase in their lives: two people in the household to love, nurture and offer financial security. But here's my question: hasn't that always been the case? Hasn't there always been a grandparent, a neighbor, a selfless boyfriend to help pick up the emotional or economic slack?

Anyway, I digress a bit.

The bigger point is America's economic nose-dive may put this new trend in reverse, so says Roberts and his crew. Unemployment, economic chaos during a consumer-driven holiday season, not to mention a daunting forecast of worse days to come, may shatter these thriving statistics and the President only knows what that could do to the well-being of black children. But here's something Roberts didn't consider in his tallying: many people are choosing to shack up, move in with relatives, and/or find roommates during this Uncertainty and that, in my opinion, could benefit [or at least inform] the financial and social well-being of children. In fact, hasn't that always been the case?

Maternal Envy: Fact or Fiction?

rebeccawalker — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 13:29:12 GMT

I came across this Psychology Today post on maternal envy and mother-daughter competition. I found this paragraph to be poignant and true:

"Half a century after Deutsche, Susie Orbach, Kim Chernin and others argued that young women's expanding career opportunities can (albeit not always) arouse a mother's envy. A daughter may hold herself back, terrified that, if she does surpass her mother, she will be forced to eat of those proverbial poisoned apples - in the form of maternal disapproval, disdain, guilt. Or, she may hope to win approval by her success, only to find that success does not give her mother pleasure; instead, her mother responds with envy, which a daughter experiences as disapproval."

This is a hotly debated subject, amd many experts deny and reframe what looks like maternal envy as maternal concern. And yet I hear from so many women who have felt undermined by their mothers. And mothers who have struggled with their jealousy of their daughters.

My feeling is not enough light has been shed on the subject, and, like mental illness, the kind of wounding that occurs in many mother daughter relationships is even more devastating because daughters are considered ungrateful for voicing their feelings, and punished accordingly. Especially in the black community, when so many mothers have had to work so hard for so long. The idea of expressing any kind of upset is unthinkable. And yet, as Audre Lorde wrote, "Our silence will not protect us."

What about you? Have you experienced any of these kinds of maternal conflicts? Either as a mother yourself or as a daughter?

Time to talk, to open the doors. We all have something to gain.

SNL BLIND SKIT: OVERBOARD?

Keith Josef Adkins — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 16:47:48 GMT

New York Governor David Patterson is peeved. He's confessed that the Saturday Night Live skit that mocked his blindness and cocaine history as well as his inability to properly govern a state was in poor taste. Spoofing politicians isn't a foreign entity with SNL, we all know this, but somebody should draw a line. No? The SNL writers jokingly paralleled Patterson's blindness with other "freaky oddities" like someone who possesses large gums and small teeth as well as someone who struggles with a deformed arm. And that, in my opinion, is cruel and juvenile and lazy. I've worked with comedy writers [and some very funny ones], and although many of them "go there" to get "the funny" [and that means joking about elderly women copulating with dogs] I never condoned using people's handicaps and disabilities as a source for funny. I think SNL should stick to Sarah Palin and her wolf-killing.